What Are We?
by ALargeBear
Summary: Riko asks Chika about a certain confession.


Riko knew there would never be a better time or place.

The beach in front of their homes was special. Somewhere they could get lost in nothing but the sunset, waves, and each other's company, and Riko would never trade it for anything as the cool autumn air contrasted with the warm shoulder pressed up against her own. It was Chika's shoulder, and Riko had a hard time focusing on anything else, despite the evening's beauty, and plans she hoped could be followed through on.

"So." Chika looked out toward the ocean, knees up against her chest. "What did you want to talk about? You sounded super nervous when you called me, is everything alright?"

Riko had practiced so hard, but in Chika's presence, her confidence fell apart. Words that she'd lost sleep trying to memorize caught in the back of her throat, no way of forcing them out. It felt like those first few meetings, where the only things she could focus on were nerves and fears. This was different, feelings no longer bred from unfamiliarity, instead, coming from a love she had started to come to terms with.

"Hello. Earth to Riko." Chika nudged Riko's shoulder, her attention now to her side with a smile. "If something's wrong you can tell me, you know?"

Riko shook her head and blinked, forcing herself to talk as she looked at Chika. "I'm fine, just thinking about some stuff."

"What stuff?"

"Well..." Riko stopped herself, Chika's earnest smile forcing her attention back out toward the ocean with red cheeks. It was unfair the effect a simple smile had, but she'd have to try to press forward. "What are we?"

A moment of silence as Chika pushed further into Riko's shoulder. "I don't get it?"

"You know, me and you." Riko pointed to Chika than back to herself. "What are we?"

"We're friends, right? Unless I'm missing something here. You know I can be a little slow sometimes."

"You're not slow," Riko said. "But that's all we are. Just friends, right?"

Chika crinkled her nose. "If we aren't friends then what are we?"

Riko let the conversation die, any plan she had falling apart as her composure faltered. Digging a hand into the sand at her side, she squeezed down and bit her lip. Her heart thumped with a vigor she'd never known as she tried stealing glances at Chika's face. There wasn't anything but a small and inviting smile. So radiant and warm, but it made her want to gnaw even harder on her lip. A cowardice that she hadn't known since joining Aqours reared its head in the back of her mind.

"I really don't get what you mean, Riko?" Chika said. "But I want to. I mean, look at you. You haven't been this nervous around me since we first met. It's weird."

"I'm not nervous." Riko's voice cracked.

"But you're so tense." Chika put a hand on Riko's shoulder and gently ran it back and forth. "And you won't even look at me. I've already said it, but you know you can tell me anything. I could never get mad at you."

All the other nights practice already forgotten, but it was Chika, Riko had long since learned that nothing would come between them. It was almost enough to crack a smile, but the churning of her stomach still took priority. Deep breaths and a bit of resolve from Chika's hand was what she focused on.

"You promise things won't get weird?" Riko asked.

"Of course not." Chika chuckled. "I mean c'mon, we're friends with Mari Ohara and a fallen angel named Yohane. Nothing you tell me could ever top that."

"I guess you're right." Riko unclenched the sand in her hand as she laughed. It was quiet and meek, but enough. "But you still have to promise me things won't change."

"Things won't change." Chika's hand slid from Riko's shoulder to her back, offering gentle circles. "I promise."

"Then." Riko faced Chika but was to caught up in her own thoughts to notice or understand. Deep breaths as she willed herself to continue. "When I said I loved you before. What did that mean to you?"

"Oh, that." Chika went quiet, breaking eye-contact as she looked out toward the ocean.

"I think that meant more to me than it did to you." Riko couldn't get a read on Chika's expressionless face. She brought her hands together, setting them in her lap and fiddling her thumbs. "I want to know for sure."

No answer and Riko lost any confidence. She stopped trying to gather anything from Chika's straight lips, hanging her head. The setting sun's light distorted in tears on the verge of falling. She'd fight them off, Chika didn't deserve to see her like this. It wasn't her fault, and the last thing Riko ever wanted was for Chika to blame herself.

"I thought," Chika started, still looking out at the ocean, filling a tense silence. "I thought you meant you loved me like a friend. Like I love You and Kanan. Something like that, you know? There's no way you'd actually love me like that, right?"

"But, what if I said I didn't mean it like friends." Riko's heart sped up. Her hands squeezed together tight. Hope was back, small and dim, but it was there. "What would you say to that?"

"I'd say." Chika sighed, a solemn smile on her face as she looked over to Riko. "That it'd be like a dream come true. Because then that means the girl I love more than anyone else would feel the same way about me."

Riko tried to find the right words, but her voice failed every time. Chika's half-smile was near enough to bring her to tears again. Not in fear of rejection, or sadness, but in the ecstasy of hearing those words come out of Chika's mouth. That futility of an unrequited love replaced by passion and care.

"I didn't want to tell you all this," Chika said before Riko could compose herself, leaving no room for disagreement. "It's embarrassing, but if it helps you just a little bit then it was worth it. I'll always tell you anything if you think it can help."

"You're such an idiot." Riko found her voice, cracked and subdued. She wanted to reach out and pull Chika in tight, but her words were frustrating.

"I know, and you don't have to answer me or anything." Chika again spoke up before Riko, eyes looking into one another. "It's nice just being able to tell you."

Riko had enough. In a fit of joy and frustration, she lunged toward Chika, arms around her shoulders and cheeks rubbing together.

"I love you," Riko shouted, eyes closed as she squeezed Chika as close as she could. "Get that through your thick head."

"You're serious?" Chika's hands hovered inches above Riko's back, waiting. "You mean it like I do?"

"Of course." Riko felt herself being pulled in tighter by hands on her back. "I would never say something like that to a friend."

There wasn't anything more to say, Riko felt at home in Chika's arms. Everything was stupid in retrospect. The weeks of misunderstanding, the walking on eggshells, and the fear that she'd lost out on her first love all seemed so petty. She had Chika holding her, whispering I love yous sweetly into her ear as they lost themselves on the beach.

"This whole time I was so scared." Riko's arms were tight around Chika's neck, her words muffled into the girl's shirt. "You acted like nothing changed. I felt so stupid."

"I'm sorry." Chika rubbed her hand up and down Riko's back, coaxing out subtle cries. "I never thought you'd feel that way about me. You're so amazing, and I couldn't believe it. So I kinda just ignored it."

"You know I hate that part of you." Riko pulled back, righting herself in Chika's arms, her face inches from Chika's.

"What?"

"The whole 'I'm not good enough' thing," Riko said, feeling Chika's breath on her nose.

"But it's true."

Riko put her forehead to Chika's, quieting her. "It's not, and I don't ever want to hear you say it again. I've been so worried ever since I confessed that you didn't feel the same way. I love you, and the only thing that matters is that you love me, too."

"You don't have to worry about that." Chika pushed her face in closer, lips grazing one another before she pulled back. "Because I love you a whole lot, and I can tell you every day now without holding myself back."

The sun had fallen below the ocean's surface. The air cooler, darker, as Riko had trouble making out anything past Chika's face. Her skirt and hands full of sand, eyes bloodshot, and body cold in the ocean air. But she didn't care, and she was sure Chika didn't either.


End file.
